I'm Great to Have Along on Road Trips

I'm back home. Chelsea and I drove back from El Paso today. On the 9 hour car ride home I amused myself by doing such things as:

A) Singing the entirety of Elton John's Tiny Dancer one line faster than it was actually playing. Sometimes you false start and you just have to roll with it. This worked fine musically at some points, not-so-well at most. And at one point I did have to belt out "Jesus freaks, out in the street, something something out for God!" because I had to get the line out before Sir Elton caught up to me and for the life of me I couldn't remember the real words. [Incidentally: "Handing tickets out for God." Obviously.] Chelsea fully backed me on this project and I intend to attempt it with other songs in the near future, except that I don't think I know many songs well enough to sing the lyrics ahead of the singer him/herself. Another deterrent to the continuation of this project/experiment is that it is stupid and pointless.

B) Changing lyrics to rap songs so that they can be sung by/to my basset hound. Examples include: "On the front porch barking bring 'em out, bring 'em out! In the backyard barking bring 'em out, bring 'em out!" or "Shake that bas for me, shake that bas for me, come on Co!" Cohen, of course, was fast asleep in the backseat the whole time, but should the dog ever decide he wants to live up to his name and be a rap star, my sister and I will have a routine ready. [In case you don't know, his name as a young puppy before my sister gave him to me was T.I., after the rapper, so I went ahead and registered him as T.I. Cohen. So far he hasn't proven to be a very gangsta dog, but he's young yet].

C) Shouting "Jesus take the wheel!" and flinging my hands in the air and then admonishing Jesus for doing a damn lousy job of taking over on the steering.

Oh, and a certain Pussycat Dolls song may have been played a minimum of three times and possibly more. Possibly. I'm not confirming or denying that except to suggest that if such a thing DID happen it was on account of my sister's bad influence and I still fundamentally think the song is utter crap except that maybe, just maybe, it does kind of grow on you but not so much that you'd actually pay to download such a thing, thankyouverymuch.

And in case you are somewhat concerned by the above descriptions, let me assure you that I was in fact sober the entire way across the state. I'm just that much fun in the car all the time!

On a completely unrelated note, I talked to Mike's girlfriend today. Yeah, really. I'm planning to leave the whole story for another entry because I'm too drained to rehash it at the moment, but the very brief version: it was a surprisingly good turn of events.

Less than three weeks until England!