So I was going to sit down tonight to write about everything that has been going on in my life lately but then I realized I'm just way too tired. That and I somehow just killed three hours of my life catching up on e-mail and posting pictures and while that was stuff I needed to do, I can't believe how long it took me to catch up on all of it and I just can't justify spending any more time on the internet tonight. Not when I have actual homework to do. I mean, it's not like I'm going to actually do homework on a Saturday night, either, but I could at least go to sleep a couple of hours earlier than normal so that I can stay up later and do more homework tomorrow without needing a nap.
Rocky opens a week from Tuesday and I'm absolutely nowhere near where I need to be for that project, surprise surprise. Procrastinating has served me well my entire life, why start making things easier on myself now? My work on Kelly's show is over, but it doesn't matter because I really need to start working on school applications NOW so one project has just replaced another, and I think I bombed a test on Thursday night because I rushed the last of the three essays so that I could finish the test in time to go see a show and drink margaritas with some of the other grads. At the time I didn't care, but now that a couple of days have gone by I'm thinking that, hmmm, maybe sacrificing twenty points of my test score for a margarita wasn't the wisest idea. I can only hope that it's more like ten points instead of twenty and that the fact that everyone else except for two people had already finished the test before me (which is why I was rushing in the first place) means that they didn't write fabulously detailed answers, either.
So, uh, school is...yeah.
I went out three nights in a row this week and was drinking on two of them, which is not my standard operating mode anymore, so I think that's maybe why I'm feeling extra tired tonight. The fact that I even consider two nights in a row of drinking as a big deal is kind of sad to me. Or maybe I'm supposed to be proud of myself that I'm not boozing four or five nights a week anymore? The fact of the matter is that my overall level of productivity seems to be about the same whether I'm drinking four nights a week or half that much, so I don't know what that says about me. It was a fun week, and I'm glad everyone in my life has a little more time to hang out these days outside of the academic setting, but next week I'm putting myself under house arrest. For real this time.
I still have so many other things I'd really like to get around to talking about eventually. Here's a preview of some things I may or may not ever actually write about:
-The party and the Stones concert in El Paso that I still haven't talked about but really should because that's actually something somewhat exciting and out of the ordinary and surely that would be more interesting than another I'm So Busy entry
-Cohen's painting skills at our trip to Pet Fest today
-My current stand on the Mike situation (incidentally, don't even get me started on why after eight months there's still even something I think about as the "Mike situation" in the first place because Jesus, shouldn't we have a handle on this by now?!), or the sort-of-flattering-sort-of-sad text messages I'm once again getting from The Ex Who Shall Not Be Named, or the confusing mixed messages I am occasionally getting from a friend, or all the 18 year olds that have crushes on me (why?!), or something, ANYTHING remotely interesting involving a guy
-Thanksgiving plans, as this is the first year of my life that I'm not going home for Thanksgiving and I can't decide what to do with myself
-Thoughts on my upcoming 24th birthday (soon, too soon)
Saturday, October 28, 2006
Monday, October 23, 2006
The Not-an-Update Update
So, I have a whole lot to say about my trip to El Paso. I have too much to say, in fact, and I have no idea when I'm going to get the chance to do a real bloggity update.
The basic summary is the Rolling Stones were incredibly awesome, the party was incredibly ridiculous and fun, I got to see Cassie and can't wait for her wedding,and things with Mike continue to be complicated in both good and bad ways.
I might be hiding out until Rocky starts on November 7th because I need to focus on all my dramaturgy work, so if I'm not around much until next month, well, I'm sure you don't actually care all that much. And if you do, you'll live.
Also, you should be jealous right now because I have the world's best tuxedo cat snuggled up on my lap and the world's best basset hound curled up beside me with his head on the cat. Said basset hound almost passed his Canine Good Citizen test today. He didn't quite pass because he still needs some work on proper leash walking, but I'm trying to get into another CGC class so we can try again in December. I'm very proud of him for coming so close to passing, anyway.
The basic summary is the Rolling Stones were incredibly awesome, the party was incredibly ridiculous and fun, I got to see Cassie and can't wait for her wedding,and things with Mike continue to be complicated in both good and bad ways.
I might be hiding out until Rocky starts on November 7th because I need to focus on all my dramaturgy work, so if I'm not around much until next month, well, I'm sure you don't actually care all that much. And if you do, you'll live.
Also, you should be jealous right now because I have the world's best tuxedo cat snuggled up on my lap and the world's best basset hound curled up beside me with his head on the cat. Said basset hound almost passed his Canine Good Citizen test today. He didn't quite pass because he still needs some work on proper leash walking, but I'm trying to get into another CGC class so we can try again in December. I'm very proud of him for coming so close to passing, anyway.
Tuesday, October 17, 2006
Possibilities and Off to El Paso
Guess what I'm doing the rest of today, and for most of the day tomorrow?
Absolutely nothing!!
It feels incredibly weird to have nothing to do right now, after weeks of always doing something or taking breaks to be a bum but feeling vaguely guilty for doing so because all the stuff I needed to be working on was still at the back of my mind.
Today, though, there's literally nothing I need to be doing. Everything is temporarily under control in the box office (and the department secretary is out of town this week and since she's really the person I work with most directly, there's no one around to actually pay attention to whether or not I'm doing my job anyway). Shockingly, everything is temporarily under control with my thesis project as well. I turned in my official proposal last week and it's being reviewed right now. I should hear back on it by the end of the week but I have no reason to believe it won't be approved. As for actually working on the show, I'm feeling good about everything. I wrote the press release over the weekend and helped the director with the program notes, which are two of my most important, these-two-items-are-absolute-necessities jobs. I have a whole bunch of ideas for my lobby display, and while I do need to start putting that together, there's no reason it can't wait until after my trip to El Paso. And this morning I gave my lecture in the Dramatic Theory class. I thought it went...okay. It wasn't fabulous, mainly because I was still prepping my lecture right up until 9:00 this morning, so there wasn't really time to practice the lecture and I just sort of went in and winged it. All things considered, though, it was good. The class actually answered questions and participated in discussion, I felt at-ease for the most part, and I got quite a few laughs. Considering the fact that I don't actually think I'm a very funny person, it's amazing how much stock I place in the ability to make my students laugh. Maybe it's because my favorite professors were always the ones that could make me laugh. My second-favorite professors have always been the ones that made me feel like an equal and kept a conversational style in their lectures, and thankfully I think that's one of my strengths (and also one of the reasons I'm better suited to teaching college than high school, I'll admit--high school teaching doesn't always lend itself very well to seminar-style teaching, although I really wish it did). So anyway, the lecture went well, and the important thing is IT'S OVER! That means the whole stupid TA class is over. Now that Mandi's show is over, too, I just have my thesis and my Thursday night class to focus on, so that's good.
The other really productive thing I've done is narrow down the doctoral program search. I've decided to fill out applications for five or six schools. None of them are in Texas. I don't know why I keep getting hung up on that because while I do enjoy Texas I never intended to spend my entire life living here anyway. Plus it's not like I didn't already leave home in a very big way and have some sense of culture shock when I moved from El Paso to east/central Texas in the first place. That's certainly equivalent to an out-of-state move. A full day's drive from home is definitely out-of-state in most parts of the country. But yeah. If any of these options work out, I won't be a Texas resident by this time next year. It's a weird thought. Of course, this is assuming any of these options end up working out in my favor, and that's a pretty big assumption.
So what have I narrowed it down to? Well, there are the major, major long shots. One of them is an Ivy League school with an extremely prestigious and competitive theatre department (and it's not Harvard, so hmmm, what could I possibly be talking about?). When I say "long shot", that's pretty much the understatement of the year. I just got a pep talk from a friend about how I shouldn't be negative about my chances but as far as this particular school is concerned, I'm not being negative, I'm just being realistic. This is maybe for the best, though, as I think my grandfather would have a heart attack if I did get accepted at this particular school. He keeps forgetting that his beloved Princeton doesn't have much of a theatre option. Anyway, the same thing goes for long shot number two, an almost-equally-prestigious school in northern California. It'd be nice, but I'm not gonna hold my breath. Plus I don't know how I'd afford it.
I think I'm heading into this application process with a decent resume. My grades couldn't be better (3.9 as an undergrad and a perfect 4.0 in my current program that I don't plan to lose between now and January). Although I think I could get a better GRE score if I took it again today, the GRE score I earned my senior year of college is acceptable and meets the minimum required for all of the programs I've researched. (I have a verbal score that I think is pretty impressive and a math score that I think is average at best, but since when do theatre people do intensive math?) I haven't done much (read: any) professional theatre work, but I've done a lot of college theatre work both at TCU and here. And my work is varied. I have experience directing and ADing, stage managing, and I think I'll have more dramaturgy work on my resume than most people. I've even done some acting. I've done two study abroad programs, one of which has given me the opportunity to name-drop some pretty high caliber names on my resume. I'll have presented a paper at a national conference (a small one, but national nonetheless). I have a minor in secondary education and have teaching experience, which should be a big plus. And my work has a lot of variety. The fact that I've dramaturged both The Rover and The Rocky Horror Show should be kind of intriguing, I think.
So yeah, I am going into this with some good things. I'm also going into this with some pretty notable deficits. The lack of "real world" experience is a big one. The fact that I'm only (almost) 24 is another. And there's the whole foreign language thing. I think I can honestly say that I have a "working knowledge" of Spanish, but I'm not sure what exactly "working knowledge" means. Plus Spanish isn't really the language of choice for theatre studies. French or German would have been the smart choices, but I picked Spanish when I was 12 years old and hey, it seemed like a good decision at the time.
So yes, I'm going to apply to the longshot schools. I mean, why not? The fact that my advisors don't think it would be a total waste of time to fill out the applications makes me proud. And I feel like I owe it to them to at least try. The worst case scenario is that I'm out the super-expensive application fee and they tell me, "Sorry, not this year." But if I don't try I'll never know and yeah, I'll probably always wonder. Plus I'd rather apply to as many schools as possible in one go. Once you've filled out one application you've pretty much filled out them all, so it would be stupid not to give myself as many chances as possible, even the not-really-a-chance chances.
So now you probably want to know where I think I do have a chance. Well, to be perfectly honest I'm scared that right now I don't have a chance anywhere and I'm going to have to get more experience somewhere and try again in a few years. And that's not the end of the world, I know. But there are four other schools I will be applying to this winter that might actually consider my application. I don't want to get too detailed because...I don't really know. I just don't. On the off-chance that I do get into one of these schools and move in the next year, I'd like to be able to retain some degree of online anonymity. Paranoid much? But yeah. Anyway. One is in Ohio (not the college I'll be speaking at next month, but maybe I'll at least be able to get a small feel for that part of the country), one is in Minnesota, one is in Maryland, and the other is another California school, this one in southern California (waaaay southern California).
So there are my options. I may still add one or two more, depending on if I turn up anything else interesting and to up my odds. But for now it seems as though before the end of next year, if I get lucky, I'll be in California, New England, Maryland, Ohio, or Minnesota. Talk about variety. Of course, I probably won't actually have to choose. I'll be lucky to just get one of those options, ya know? Still, I suppose I could be happy in any of those places. I can't really envision myself living in any of those places, but I can't envision myself staying here, either. I like the Austin area, I like it more than any other place I've ever lived, but there's just not much else I can do here for now. The truth is, I can't think much further than January. But I'll see what happens.
Or, you know, I'll still be here in Texas, bartending and wondering what the heck I'm going to do with my life.
The possibilities are endless!!
Oh, by the way, I'm off to El Paso tomorrow for Drunken Craziness With Everyone I've Ever Known in El Paso, Including Old High School Teachers and Probably the Mailman. This event is also known as My Parents' Huge Birthday Bash. My parents both turn 50 this month (Dad already had his birthday and Mom's is at the end of the month) so tomorrow they're shutting down my dad's bar for the night and throwing themselves a big party. I think it's going to be ridiculous. People are flying in from out of town, and I think my parents invited every single person they've ever met in El Paso. It's going to be open bar all night long. I'm pretty sure there's going to be a live band, and probably karaoke (my mom and her girlfriends love to get everyone drunk and make them do karaoke; the last time I went to karaoke with my mom I got so drunk I kissed my mom's best friend's son whom I've known since I was six weeks old,and while it was totally his idea and our mothers were thrilled, I'm not planning a repeat performance). My dad has rented a limo for the sole purpose of chauffering drunk people home. Oh, and for picking my siblings and I up at the airport tomorrow evening since we don't get home until 5:30 and my parents will apparently be too busy primping by that point to pick us up at the airport. The El Paso airport is not the sort of airport where people generally get picked up by limo services, so we get to be those pretentious assholes. Grand. Still, I'm excited. At the very least I'm bound to get a good story or two out of the evening, if I can remember much of it. Because hey, it's open bar and there's a limo to drive me home, you'd better believe I'm going to drink a stupid amount of alcohol! You should probably call me tomorrow night, I bet I'll be amusing.
And then on Friday we're seeing Dave Matthews Band and THE ROLLING STONES. Eeeeee! So exciting!!!
And one of the best parts is that when I told one of my professors today that I was going out of town, instead of being concerned she just said, "It's probably a very good idea for you to take a few days off right now. You know, step back and assess everything from a distance so you don't get overwhelmed." And the department chair said, "Have fun! Don't worry about anything, we've got it under control!" So not only do I get to skip class and work for the rest of the week, I'm doing it with the blessing of the department. Sweet.
Anyway, I'm off to waste the rest of the afternoon. A friend suggested eating cookies and masturbating, but I think I'm leaning towards more Grey's Anatomy and a nap. At least for now...Ha.
Absolutely nothing!!
It feels incredibly weird to have nothing to do right now, after weeks of always doing something or taking breaks to be a bum but feeling vaguely guilty for doing so because all the stuff I needed to be working on was still at the back of my mind.
Today, though, there's literally nothing I need to be doing. Everything is temporarily under control in the box office (and the department secretary is out of town this week and since she's really the person I work with most directly, there's no one around to actually pay attention to whether or not I'm doing my job anyway). Shockingly, everything is temporarily under control with my thesis project as well. I turned in my official proposal last week and it's being reviewed right now. I should hear back on it by the end of the week but I have no reason to believe it won't be approved. As for actually working on the show, I'm feeling good about everything. I wrote the press release over the weekend and helped the director with the program notes, which are two of my most important, these-two-items-are-absolute-necessities jobs. I have a whole bunch of ideas for my lobby display, and while I do need to start putting that together, there's no reason it can't wait until after my trip to El Paso. And this morning I gave my lecture in the Dramatic Theory class. I thought it went...okay. It wasn't fabulous, mainly because I was still prepping my lecture right up until 9:00 this morning, so there wasn't really time to practice the lecture and I just sort of went in and winged it. All things considered, though, it was good. The class actually answered questions and participated in discussion, I felt at-ease for the most part, and I got quite a few laughs. Considering the fact that I don't actually think I'm a very funny person, it's amazing how much stock I place in the ability to make my students laugh. Maybe it's because my favorite professors were always the ones that could make me laugh. My second-favorite professors have always been the ones that made me feel like an equal and kept a conversational style in their lectures, and thankfully I think that's one of my strengths (and also one of the reasons I'm better suited to teaching college than high school, I'll admit--high school teaching doesn't always lend itself very well to seminar-style teaching, although I really wish it did). So anyway, the lecture went well, and the important thing is IT'S OVER! That means the whole stupid TA class is over. Now that Mandi's show is over, too, I just have my thesis and my Thursday night class to focus on, so that's good.
The other really productive thing I've done is narrow down the doctoral program search. I've decided to fill out applications for five or six schools. None of them are in Texas. I don't know why I keep getting hung up on that because while I do enjoy Texas I never intended to spend my entire life living here anyway. Plus it's not like I didn't already leave home in a very big way and have some sense of culture shock when I moved from El Paso to east/central Texas in the first place. That's certainly equivalent to an out-of-state move. A full day's drive from home is definitely out-of-state in most parts of the country. But yeah. If any of these options work out, I won't be a Texas resident by this time next year. It's a weird thought. Of course, this is assuming any of these options end up working out in my favor, and that's a pretty big assumption.
So what have I narrowed it down to? Well, there are the major, major long shots. One of them is an Ivy League school with an extremely prestigious and competitive theatre department (and it's not Harvard, so hmmm, what could I possibly be talking about?). When I say "long shot", that's pretty much the understatement of the year. I just got a pep talk from a friend about how I shouldn't be negative about my chances but as far as this particular school is concerned, I'm not being negative, I'm just being realistic. This is maybe for the best, though, as I think my grandfather would have a heart attack if I did get accepted at this particular school. He keeps forgetting that his beloved Princeton doesn't have much of a theatre option. Anyway, the same thing goes for long shot number two, an almost-equally-prestigious school in northern California. It'd be nice, but I'm not gonna hold my breath. Plus I don't know how I'd afford it.
I think I'm heading into this application process with a decent resume. My grades couldn't be better (3.9 as an undergrad and a perfect 4.0 in my current program that I don't plan to lose between now and January). Although I think I could get a better GRE score if I took it again today, the GRE score I earned my senior year of college is acceptable and meets the minimum required for all of the programs I've researched. (I have a verbal score that I think is pretty impressive and a math score that I think is average at best, but since when do theatre people do intensive math?) I haven't done much (read: any) professional theatre work, but I've done a lot of college theatre work both at TCU and here. And my work is varied. I have experience directing and ADing, stage managing, and I think I'll have more dramaturgy work on my resume than most people. I've even done some acting. I've done two study abroad programs, one of which has given me the opportunity to name-drop some pretty high caliber names on my resume. I'll have presented a paper at a national conference (a small one, but national nonetheless). I have a minor in secondary education and have teaching experience, which should be a big plus. And my work has a lot of variety. The fact that I've dramaturged both The Rover and The Rocky Horror Show should be kind of intriguing, I think.
So yeah, I am going into this with some good things. I'm also going into this with some pretty notable deficits. The lack of "real world" experience is a big one. The fact that I'm only (almost) 24 is another. And there's the whole foreign language thing. I think I can honestly say that I have a "working knowledge" of Spanish, but I'm not sure what exactly "working knowledge" means. Plus Spanish isn't really the language of choice for theatre studies. French or German would have been the smart choices, but I picked Spanish when I was 12 years old and hey, it seemed like a good decision at the time.
So yes, I'm going to apply to the longshot schools. I mean, why not? The fact that my advisors don't think it would be a total waste of time to fill out the applications makes me proud. And I feel like I owe it to them to at least try. The worst case scenario is that I'm out the super-expensive application fee and they tell me, "Sorry, not this year." But if I don't try I'll never know and yeah, I'll probably always wonder. Plus I'd rather apply to as many schools as possible in one go. Once you've filled out one application you've pretty much filled out them all, so it would be stupid not to give myself as many chances as possible, even the not-really-a-chance chances.
So now you probably want to know where I think I do have a chance. Well, to be perfectly honest I'm scared that right now I don't have a chance anywhere and I'm going to have to get more experience somewhere and try again in a few years. And that's not the end of the world, I know. But there are four other schools I will be applying to this winter that might actually consider my application. I don't want to get too detailed because...I don't really know. I just don't. On the off-chance that I do get into one of these schools and move in the next year, I'd like to be able to retain some degree of online anonymity. Paranoid much? But yeah. Anyway. One is in Ohio (not the college I'll be speaking at next month, but maybe I'll at least be able to get a small feel for that part of the country), one is in Minnesota, one is in Maryland, and the other is another California school, this one in southern California (waaaay southern California).
So there are my options. I may still add one or two more, depending on if I turn up anything else interesting and to up my odds. But for now it seems as though before the end of next year, if I get lucky, I'll be in California, New England, Maryland, Ohio, or Minnesota. Talk about variety. Of course, I probably won't actually have to choose. I'll be lucky to just get one of those options, ya know? Still, I suppose I could be happy in any of those places. I can't really envision myself living in any of those places, but I can't envision myself staying here, either. I like the Austin area, I like it more than any other place I've ever lived, but there's just not much else I can do here for now. The truth is, I can't think much further than January. But I'll see what happens.
Or, you know, I'll still be here in Texas, bartending and wondering what the heck I'm going to do with my life.
The possibilities are endless!!
Oh, by the way, I'm off to El Paso tomorrow for Drunken Craziness With Everyone I've Ever Known in El Paso, Including Old High School Teachers and Probably the Mailman. This event is also known as My Parents' Huge Birthday Bash. My parents both turn 50 this month (Dad already had his birthday and Mom's is at the end of the month) so tomorrow they're shutting down my dad's bar for the night and throwing themselves a big party. I think it's going to be ridiculous. People are flying in from out of town, and I think my parents invited every single person they've ever met in El Paso. It's going to be open bar all night long. I'm pretty sure there's going to be a live band, and probably karaoke (my mom and her girlfriends love to get everyone drunk and make them do karaoke; the last time I went to karaoke with my mom I got so drunk I kissed my mom's best friend's son whom I've known since I was six weeks old,and while it was totally his idea and our mothers were thrilled, I'm not planning a repeat performance). My dad has rented a limo for the sole purpose of chauffering drunk people home. Oh, and for picking my siblings and I up at the airport tomorrow evening since we don't get home until 5:30 and my parents will apparently be too busy primping by that point to pick us up at the airport. The El Paso airport is not the sort of airport where people generally get picked up by limo services, so we get to be those pretentious assholes. Grand. Still, I'm excited. At the very least I'm bound to get a good story or two out of the evening, if I can remember much of it. Because hey, it's open bar and there's a limo to drive me home, you'd better believe I'm going to drink a stupid amount of alcohol! You should probably call me tomorrow night, I bet I'll be amusing.
And then on Friday we're seeing Dave Matthews Band and THE ROLLING STONES. Eeeeee! So exciting!!!
And one of the best parts is that when I told one of my professors today that I was going out of town, instead of being concerned she just said, "It's probably a very good idea for you to take a few days off right now. You know, step back and assess everything from a distance so you don't get overwhelmed." And the department chair said, "Have fun! Don't worry about anything, we've got it under control!" So not only do I get to skip class and work for the rest of the week, I'm doing it with the blessing of the department. Sweet.
Anyway, I'm off to waste the rest of the afternoon. A friend suggested eating cookies and masturbating, but I think I'm leaning towards more Grey's Anatomy and a nap. At least for now...Ha.
Sunday, October 15, 2006
Ricky Bobby, Ricky Bobby
Last night I was on 6th Street with Mandi and her friends Amy, Becky, and Brenna, who had come up from her hometown to see the show this weekend. The show went really well, by the way. We had decent-sized crowds both nights and everyone seemed to enjoy it. As much as I liked working on the show and as happy as I am to have more stage management experience on my resume, I'm glad it's over. That's 12+ hours a week that will be free now that weren't free before and I can do a lot with 12 hours. Even if what I choose to do with said hours is bake cookies and watch reruns of Grey's.
Anyway, last night we went up to 6th Street. I didn't get there until 12:30, but then I rapidly made up for lost time and had a couple of Jager bomb-esque shots (they weren't Jager bombs, I don't know what they were, but they were big stupid shots of the Jager bomb variety) and then I had a couple of beers and then I wanted a rum and Coke but someone ordered another beer for me accidentally so I ended up with the beer plus the rum and Coke, and then I had the presence of mind to stop drinking so I could actually drive home. Sometimes I'm reasonable. Sometimes...Anyway, we had a great time dancing and drinking at Darwin's (which you may remember as the bar where Jenny once infamously tried to shove a dollar coin into the quarter slot on a video game and then berated the poor bartender for having a broken game) and then we went to some bar in a basement that played great music and had cool lighting and served reasonably priced drinks, which is really all you need in a 6th Street bar, and then we went back to Darwin's.
By the time we left Darwin's for the second time, everyone was in various stages of drunk. I was my favorite sort of buzzed: drunk enough that I can enjoy being around other drunk people and laugh at drunken antics, but sober enough that I'm still perfectly capable of believably pretending that I haven't had a drink all evening, should such a need arise. Mandi was dancing in the street with her boyfriend, Brenna was drunk-dialing an ex, and Amy was supporting herself on the light post. So Becky and I, who were the most sober ones by far, were chatting when up strolled this strange little blonde guy. He sidled up to Becky and said, "So can I go inside?" and gestured to the bar. Becky just shrugged and said, "You can try, but it's closed," and then we ignored him. Imagine our surprise when, five minutes later, we realized he was still standing there, just awkwardly staring at us. By that time we were trying to get our group organized so we could head home, so we were talking about who was riding in which car. And creepy blonde guy took it upon himself to say to Becky-and this is a direct quote-"Do you have room for me in your car, Ricky Bobby, Ricky Bobby?" And he said it in a weird accent that I think was supposed to sound British but I'm really not sure. Becky, without skipping a beat, responded, "No, my car is full, Ricky Bobby, Ricky Bobby." I died. I'm still laughing about it almost 24 hours later. I suppose you really had to be there to understand why it was so funny, but it was hysterical. Why Ricky Bobby? What could he possibly have meant by that?
Then we went back to Mandi's apartment and Brenna collapsed on the living room floor, and we left Amy sleeping in the truck because it was just easier, and Mandi prayed very intently about the state of her bathroom plumbing, and I lost my ring in the couch cushions and while unearthing it I found a remote control that Mandi and Jason have never seen before in their lives, a Lion King Gameboy cartridge circa 1995, and a pair of panties that Mandi swears can't possibly be hers. We were fascinated and horrified all at once.
All in all it was a fun-albeit ridiculous-night. And now I suppose I should go to bed or work on lecture planning for the class I'm teaching on Tuesday or something else productive.
Anyway, last night we went up to 6th Street. I didn't get there until 12:30, but then I rapidly made up for lost time and had a couple of Jager bomb-esque shots (they weren't Jager bombs, I don't know what they were, but they were big stupid shots of the Jager bomb variety) and then I had a couple of beers and then I wanted a rum and Coke but someone ordered another beer for me accidentally so I ended up with the beer plus the rum and Coke, and then I had the presence of mind to stop drinking so I could actually drive home. Sometimes I'm reasonable. Sometimes...Anyway, we had a great time dancing and drinking at Darwin's (which you may remember as the bar where Jenny once infamously tried to shove a dollar coin into the quarter slot on a video game and then berated the poor bartender for having a broken game) and then we went to some bar in a basement that played great music and had cool lighting and served reasonably priced drinks, which is really all you need in a 6th Street bar, and then we went back to Darwin's.
By the time we left Darwin's for the second time, everyone was in various stages of drunk. I was my favorite sort of buzzed: drunk enough that I can enjoy being around other drunk people and laugh at drunken antics, but sober enough that I'm still perfectly capable of believably pretending that I haven't had a drink all evening, should such a need arise. Mandi was dancing in the street with her boyfriend, Brenna was drunk-dialing an ex, and Amy was supporting herself on the light post. So Becky and I, who were the most sober ones by far, were chatting when up strolled this strange little blonde guy. He sidled up to Becky and said, "So can I go inside?" and gestured to the bar. Becky just shrugged and said, "You can try, but it's closed," and then we ignored him. Imagine our surprise when, five minutes later, we realized he was still standing there, just awkwardly staring at us. By that time we were trying to get our group organized so we could head home, so we were talking about who was riding in which car. And creepy blonde guy took it upon himself to say to Becky-and this is a direct quote-"Do you have room for me in your car, Ricky Bobby, Ricky Bobby?" And he said it in a weird accent that I think was supposed to sound British but I'm really not sure. Becky, without skipping a beat, responded, "No, my car is full, Ricky Bobby, Ricky Bobby." I died. I'm still laughing about it almost 24 hours later. I suppose you really had to be there to understand why it was so funny, but it was hysterical. Why Ricky Bobby? What could he possibly have meant by that?
Then we went back to Mandi's apartment and Brenna collapsed on the living room floor, and we left Amy sleeping in the truck because it was just easier, and Mandi prayed very intently about the state of her bathroom plumbing, and I lost my ring in the couch cushions and while unearthing it I found a remote control that Mandi and Jason have never seen before in their lives, a Lion King Gameboy cartridge circa 1995, and a pair of panties that Mandi swears can't possibly be hers. We were fascinated and horrified all at once.
All in all it was a fun-albeit ridiculous-night. And now I suppose I should go to bed or work on lecture planning for the class I'm teaching on Tuesday or something else productive.
Monday, October 09, 2006
This Weekend...
This Weekend I:
-Fell down a flight of stairs at the show I was working Friday night. Of course I landed at the feet of the show's director, who had been a jerk to me and the house manager all week long. And of course I was wearing a dress.
-Fell down AGAIN while walking to the bar three hours later.
-Decided I'm permanently retiring the shoes I was wearing on Friday night, because that's fucking ridiculous.
-Spent all day Friday helping Mandi get set pieces for her show. It was an ordeal that involved picking up major kitchen appliances found at the side of the road, backing a giant U-Haul up onto a laughably narrow loading dock, and hauling a washing machine up and down stairs on a dolly, amongst other things (Have you ever moved a washing machine? I don't recommend it unless you want to increase your chance of ending up in the ER tenfold.)
-Was in rehearsal today for six hours.
-Chose cleaning my apartment over going on a date, because I've realized that I was feeling like the new guy was just using a date as a means to an end, the "end" in this case being sex. And I hate feeling like that. I want the physical stuff to be the icing on the cake, not the entire point. Even though we were having a pretty good time together, I realized the thing that was making me uneasy was that I felt like he was only taking me out and feeding me and buying me drinks so that he could hopefully get me into bed. And I know that's often the point of dating, but I don't want it to be the point. I want to be with someone who loves talking to me as much as making out with me, and while he seemed to truly enjoy talking to me he was also often like, "When are we going to kiss again?" and...NO.
-Fought with a customer at the box office. If I tell the whole story here I'll probably get so angry I'll give myself a stroke, but I'll just say that it's probably the worst exchange I've ever had with a customer and I have been waiting tables, bartending, parking people's cars, or selling people show tickets for seven years now. Words cannot express how much of an asshole this guy was. But I kept my cool. I wanted to punch his stupid face, but I argued as politely as possible and then despite the fact that I was appalled by his behavior, I finally let him into the theater. But only after finishing the conversation with, "I just want you to know that you're an incredibly irresponsible person. And stop lying to my face. It's insulting, and even more so in this case because you are a really terrible liar." So he went upstairs to the show--ten minutes late and without paying--and then guess what I found out from one of my ushers at intermission?
During the entire first act of the show, he sat there as his girlfriend gave him a handjob. WHAT IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE?!?!?!?!?! I wanted to report him for lewd behavior so badly, but I knew that since it was after the fact there was no way I could prove anything had been going on. Still, the usher said it was unmistakable. Even if there hadn't been enough light coming from the stage to see exactly what was happening, his girlfriend apparently doesn't know how to be discreet with a zipper.
I'm sure he'll end up being a politician.
I was looking forward to having more words with him this morning when he showed up to actually pay for his tickets, but unfortunately by the time he showed up I'd already left for the afternoon. I guess that's probably for the best, because had I actually gotten a chance to "talk" to him again I'd probably be unemployed right now.
But Also:
-When I took that spectacular fall in front of the director, he shouted, "Oh my God, Ashley!!", proving for the first time that he does in fact know my name. He was also really friendly to both Mandi and I for the rest of the weekend, so apparently to get on his good side you just have to do something humiliating in front of him.
-I didn't seriously injure myself in either fall. I have a rug burn running all the way up the side of my right shin and knee, but that just makes me look tough.
-My dog still hasn't been thrown out of his Canine Good Citizen training class, and when he actually focuses in class he looks so serious and determined that it makes my heart hurt in a good way.
-Everything is finally pretty much ready to go for the show I'm stage managing, which is good because it goes up this weekend.
-Right now I'm actually feeling totally okay with the fact that I'll choose cleaning my apartment over going on a date. When the right guy comes along I'll let my apartment fall to pieces if it means I can spend more time with him. In the meantime I can tell myself I'm too busy for a relationship right now and know that I'm only somewhat rationalizing.
-I went out with a group of the grad students on Friday night and it was great. We all drank margaritas until last call and then were having so much fun that a few people ended up coming back to my apartment to keep the fun going. At 3:30 in the morning I had an apartment full of people drinking Bacardi and Coke and laughing about everything as Grey's Anatomy played on the TV and Cohen happily wrestled with Amanda's dog Penny in the middle of the living room, and I thought, "This is awesome! Why don't we do this every night? Or at least every week?" Our schedules are why, of course. Every group that hangs out together and parties all the time needs an instigator to get things going, and none of us is regularly the instigator of that sort of thing. Which is how we ended up as nerdy grad students in the first place. Still, the big problem is that we're all working on shows and we all have different rehearsal schedules, so to have a night when we're all actually free at the same time is rare. I'm glad we took advantage this weekend. It was well worth being hungover for the first couple of hours I was waiting tables on Saturday morning.
I can't wait for next weekend!
-Fell down a flight of stairs at the show I was working Friday night. Of course I landed at the feet of the show's director, who had been a jerk to me and the house manager all week long. And of course I was wearing a dress.
-Fell down AGAIN while walking to the bar three hours later.
-Decided I'm permanently retiring the shoes I was wearing on Friday night, because that's fucking ridiculous.
-Spent all day Friday helping Mandi get set pieces for her show. It was an ordeal that involved picking up major kitchen appliances found at the side of the road, backing a giant U-Haul up onto a laughably narrow loading dock, and hauling a washing machine up and down stairs on a dolly, amongst other things (Have you ever moved a washing machine? I don't recommend it unless you want to increase your chance of ending up in the ER tenfold.)
-Was in rehearsal today for six hours.
-Chose cleaning my apartment over going on a date, because I've realized that I was feeling like the new guy was just using a date as a means to an end, the "end" in this case being sex. And I hate feeling like that. I want the physical stuff to be the icing on the cake, not the entire point. Even though we were having a pretty good time together, I realized the thing that was making me uneasy was that I felt like he was only taking me out and feeding me and buying me drinks so that he could hopefully get me into bed. And I know that's often the point of dating, but I don't want it to be the point. I want to be with someone who loves talking to me as much as making out with me, and while he seemed to truly enjoy talking to me he was also often like, "When are we going to kiss again?" and...NO.
-Fought with a customer at the box office. If I tell the whole story here I'll probably get so angry I'll give myself a stroke, but I'll just say that it's probably the worst exchange I've ever had with a customer and I have been waiting tables, bartending, parking people's cars, or selling people show tickets for seven years now. Words cannot express how much of an asshole this guy was. But I kept my cool. I wanted to punch his stupid face, but I argued as politely as possible and then despite the fact that I was appalled by his behavior, I finally let him into the theater. But only after finishing the conversation with, "I just want you to know that you're an incredibly irresponsible person. And stop lying to my face. It's insulting, and even more so in this case because you are a really terrible liar." So he went upstairs to the show--ten minutes late and without paying--and then guess what I found out from one of my ushers at intermission?
During the entire first act of the show, he sat there as his girlfriend gave him a handjob. WHAT IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE?!?!?!?!?! I wanted to report him for lewd behavior so badly, but I knew that since it was after the fact there was no way I could prove anything had been going on. Still, the usher said it was unmistakable. Even if there hadn't been enough light coming from the stage to see exactly what was happening, his girlfriend apparently doesn't know how to be discreet with a zipper.
I'm sure he'll end up being a politician.
I was looking forward to having more words with him this morning when he showed up to actually pay for his tickets, but unfortunately by the time he showed up I'd already left for the afternoon. I guess that's probably for the best, because had I actually gotten a chance to "talk" to him again I'd probably be unemployed right now.
But Also:
-When I took that spectacular fall in front of the director, he shouted, "Oh my God, Ashley!!", proving for the first time that he does in fact know my name. He was also really friendly to both Mandi and I for the rest of the weekend, so apparently to get on his good side you just have to do something humiliating in front of him.
-I didn't seriously injure myself in either fall. I have a rug burn running all the way up the side of my right shin and knee, but that just makes me look tough.
-My dog still hasn't been thrown out of his Canine Good Citizen training class, and when he actually focuses in class he looks so serious and determined that it makes my heart hurt in a good way.
-Everything is finally pretty much ready to go for the show I'm stage managing, which is good because it goes up this weekend.
-Right now I'm actually feeling totally okay with the fact that I'll choose cleaning my apartment over going on a date. When the right guy comes along I'll let my apartment fall to pieces if it means I can spend more time with him. In the meantime I can tell myself I'm too busy for a relationship right now and know that I'm only somewhat rationalizing.
-I went out with a group of the grad students on Friday night and it was great. We all drank margaritas until last call and then were having so much fun that a few people ended up coming back to my apartment to keep the fun going. At 3:30 in the morning I had an apartment full of people drinking Bacardi and Coke and laughing about everything as Grey's Anatomy played on the TV and Cohen happily wrestled with Amanda's dog Penny in the middle of the living room, and I thought, "This is awesome! Why don't we do this every night? Or at least every week?" Our schedules are why, of course. Every group that hangs out together and parties all the time needs an instigator to get things going, and none of us is regularly the instigator of that sort of thing. Which is how we ended up as nerdy grad students in the first place. Still, the big problem is that we're all working on shows and we all have different rehearsal schedules, so to have a night when we're all actually free at the same time is rare. I'm glad we took advantage this weekend. It was well worth being hungover for the first couple of hours I was waiting tables on Saturday morning.
I can't wait for next weekend!
Wednesday, October 04, 2006
Today Has Been Okay
I know I'm not the busiest person in the world. Not even close. I'm not even the busiest person around here. But sometimes, like this week, I have a hard time remembering that a lot of people actually have it harder than I do.
So I try to put things in perspective. I'm not directing a show right now, and the one I'm stage managing is over in two weeks. I'm only taking nine hours of classes instead of the twelve I took last year. I'm working two jobs, but I do realize that one of them is still totally optional and could be quit at any time. And I'm not pregnant. One of my fellow grad students is in her first trimester right now and I can't even imagine how she does everything I do while coping with morning sickness. Compared to that, I have it easy.
Still, I'll be damn happy when it's mid-November and the hardest part of the semester is behind me. There's still that whole applying to doctoral programs thing to worry about, but I also keep trying to remind myself that in the worst case scenario, there's no REAL reason why that needs to be done this year. I mean, it would be good and obviously it's in my best interest to apply if I can. But if I can't and it's just too much or it's just not possible this year, it's not the end of the world.
Oh, and I went out with that guy again on Saturday and I'm pretty much just feeling ambivalent. We definitely have a good time when we're together, but when he's not around I'm not thinking about him or thinking, "Wow, I can't wait until I can get home to talk to him." Honestly, it's just something to do, and right now when I'm so busy it just feels like one more thing on top of my already crazy schedule. I think I'll keep seeing him occasionally for now just because well, like I said, it's something to do (not "do" in that sense, sickos). But I'm not sure how fair that is to him, considering he's clearly pretty into me. I don't mean to brag but really, he is.
There's something wrong with me, I think. Why can't I get excited about a perfectly nice, attractive, fun guy? I say I don't want to be alone, but then the minute I have the chance to really be with someone in a meaningful way I decide that actually, I would rather just be alone and not worry about it. Can I possibly be that apathetic about my love life? Apparently, the answer is YES.
So I try to put things in perspective. I'm not directing a show right now, and the one I'm stage managing is over in two weeks. I'm only taking nine hours of classes instead of the twelve I took last year. I'm working two jobs, but I do realize that one of them is still totally optional and could be quit at any time. And I'm not pregnant. One of my fellow grad students is in her first trimester right now and I can't even imagine how she does everything I do while coping with morning sickness. Compared to that, I have it easy.
Still, I'll be damn happy when it's mid-November and the hardest part of the semester is behind me. There's still that whole applying to doctoral programs thing to worry about, but I also keep trying to remind myself that in the worst case scenario, there's no REAL reason why that needs to be done this year. I mean, it would be good and obviously it's in my best interest to apply if I can. But if I can't and it's just too much or it's just not possible this year, it's not the end of the world.
Oh, and I went out with that guy again on Saturday and I'm pretty much just feeling ambivalent. We definitely have a good time when we're together, but when he's not around I'm not thinking about him or thinking, "Wow, I can't wait until I can get home to talk to him." Honestly, it's just something to do, and right now when I'm so busy it just feels like one more thing on top of my already crazy schedule. I think I'll keep seeing him occasionally for now just because well, like I said, it's something to do (not "do" in that sense, sickos). But I'm not sure how fair that is to him, considering he's clearly pretty into me. I don't mean to brag but really, he is.
There's something wrong with me, I think. Why can't I get excited about a perfectly nice, attractive, fun guy? I say I don't want to be alone, but then the minute I have the chance to really be with someone in a meaningful way I decide that actually, I would rather just be alone and not worry about it. Can I possibly be that apathetic about my love life? Apparently, the answer is YES.
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