Fore!

So, I met a crazy man at the river today. It was the middle of the day and it was about a million degrees outside so after we finished our walk/jog around the park (significantly shorter than usual 'cause it's a million degrees outside), I had Cohen down in the river. He and I were both wading and I was trying to convince him to actually swim out to me when Crazy Guy rode up on his bicycle. Crazy Guy proceeded to lie his bicycle down right by the bend in the river where Cohen and I were wading, and he pulled out a cigarette and began to smoke. Clearly, Crazy Guy was not biking for exercise. Crazy Guy was missing most of his front teeth and was wearing a stained shirt but otherwise seemed fairly clean and had obviously recently had a haircut. Crazy Guy had several yards of barbed wire (a spool of barbed wire? A lasso of barbed wire? A circle of barbed wire?) hanging over his shoulder.
Crazy Guy: He doesn't like the water?
Me: He likes wading, he just doesn't like to swim. And he only goes in when it's really hot out.
Crazy Guy: I'm pretty much the same way. This is a pretty good place to come swim. At night. You just have to watch out for the water mocassins. Especially at night.
Me: Oh, yeah. Those water mocassins are bad news.
[I turn my back to Crazy Guy and focus on Cohen, hoping that now that we've exchanged friendly neighborly pleasantries he'll go on his way.]
Crazy Guy: I make barbed wire crosses.
Me: Oh, so you're out here collecting barbed wire. [Still just sort of smiling and nodding absently, hoping he'll get the hint and go on his way but not wanting to be rude about giving him the hint.]
Crazy Guy: Oh no. I got this at the consignment shop. The lady lets me keep my barbed wire there, 'cause I made her some barbed wire crosses to sell. I'm actually looking for some people I know who are supposed to be here at the river today. They wanted some crosses and I said I'd make one in front of them 'cause they want to see how I do it. It only takes me a few minutes, and then I charge between five and fifteen dollars. Whatever you can afford, really. 'Cause it's not about the money. It's just about keeping myself afloat until I can get out on the oil rig again.
Me: Well, that's good...
Crazy Guy: Yup, I'm next in line to go out to the oil fields in [someplace I couldn't understand]. So that's what I'm waiting for. I go see my sponsor every day!
Me: That's good.
Crazy Guy: He helps me out a lot. And my church has been very helpful. The First Baptist Church? They always help me find people that want to buy my crosses. I'm just keeping my head above water 'til I can get back to the oil field. All I need is a pack of cigarettes and the three dollar buffet at Valentino's. That's pretty good.
Me: Well, good luck.
Crazy Guy: I guess I'll go find those people now?
Me: Yeah.

I couldn't decide what he wanted. I couldn't decide if he was wanting me to buy a cross, or wanting me to try his church, or just wanting to have a conversation. I suppose in writing it doesn't seem all that crazy. But a) his manner of speaking was just sort of strange, b) are these things a normal person would tell a total stranger who clearly isn't all that interested in having a conversation in the first place? and c) can we agree that making barbed wire crosses is kind of a creepy hobby?

So there's that. This evening I went to the driving range with Mandi and Jason. Mandi sent me a text this morning that said, "Let's go to the driving range this afternoon and then go get beer and wings." I was a bit confused by the fact that my younger brother and Mandi apparently switched brains and personalities in the middle of the night, but I'm always down with doing different things and the driving range is definitely not one of our usual spots. Mandi is gonna go golfing with Jason and a couple of his friends tomorrow so she wanted to practice (considering she's only ever been to the driving range once before) and since I haven't touched a golf club in about 9 years we figured we could go out there and make fools of ourselves together. And actually, it was a lot of fun! After about half an hour of hitting balls I finally managed to start actually hitting some of them into the air. Well, okay, first I started hitting the ball, period. Then I started hitting them into the air, and then finally I actually started getting some decent drives. Mandi got a few good drives in there, too. Other than the fact that it was a million degrees outside (still) it was a really enjoyable afternoon. The beer and wings afterward helped, of course.

While we were hanging out drinking and having our wings after Golf Fest 2006, Mandi turned to Jason and said, "Ashley says words in everyday conversation that I don't even use in my papers." And I know she was saying it in a good-natured way and not even to tease me, but it got me thinking. Am I that really obnoxious person that seems all pretentious because I use "SAT words" in everyday conversation? I REALLY don't want to be that person. Because I've had conversations with that person, and that person sucks. Honestly, I don't do it on purpose. I don't even notice that I do it until someone points it out to me (and Mandi is not the first person to point it out; Kymberli has said the same thing, as have others). I do have a bigger vocabulary than most, I suppose. Considering my only real hobby is reading (and writing, but mostly reading), it makes sense that I have a pretty large vocabulary.
But I don't talk any differently than I write in this blog, and I don't think this blog makes me sound particularly intelligent. I don't even use proper sentence structure 70% of the time. And yet Mandi is a fellow grad student. She's a "smart kid". And here she is telling me that I sometimes use words in everyday conversation that she'd never think to use. So I can't help but worry that I must come across as really pretentious to a lot of the people I come into contact with on a daily basis. And that makes me sad, because I swear it's not intentional. I can't help it, that's just how I talk! Now I'm suddenly thinking that I should be more forgiving of all those people that I accuse of using big words just to seem impressive. Maybe they're not doing it on purpose, either.
Then again, I refuse to dumb myself down. The truth is, if you can't keep up with me I'd rather not have you as a friend. That may sound harsh, but it's true. I'm ultimately looking for friendships and relationships with people that I feel can carry on funny, interesting, and intelligent conversations. If my manner of speaking automatically weeds out certain people, well, maybe that's for the best. And that's certainly not to say you have to understand every single thing that comes out of my mouth the first time I say it, or talk like I do. I may say, "and then the conversation progressed" instead of "the conversation went on", but YOU don't have to say that. (In fact, don't say that. It's kind of retarded. But yeah, that is in fact something that came out of my mouth tonight, for example). Sure, some of my friends regularly say things far more brilliant than anything that would ever come out of my mouth. And yet some of my best friends in the world are the people that will say to me, "Hey, that word you just used? What the hell does that even mean?" And I love all of them equally. It's fine either way.