Party Animal

What is it with restaurant people?
Back when I was living in El Paso during the summers and working at my dad's restaurant (which feels like a million years ago now but really the last summer I worked there was only three years ago, just three) I would always get frustrated because I had a hard time getting close to my coworkers. I realize a large part of that was because I was the owner's daughter. The vast majority of bonding at work comes from bitching about the work environment--a fact that I realized during my college job at the performance hall, where I had absolutely no problem befriending my coworkers--and at my dad's restaurant people didn't really feel like they could let me in on all the bitching and moaning. Not that I ever would have been the mole and gone back to my dad about anything (other than something huge, like stealing) but they didn't realize that. Hell, I wouldn't have trusted me, either. I can't blame them.
The other reason I think I had trouble bonding with people at my first job was that they were all party people. Pretty much every conversation I remember about that job revolved around how hungover a particular person was, or how drunk so-and-so had been the night before, or whatever. And I could never really contribute to those conversations. At first during the first couple of summers it's because I really wasn't partying enough to talk about it. Then once I finished my crazy sophomore year of college and realized I had a much more healthy appetite for boozing (and occasional recreational drug use) than I originally thought, I got along much better with my coworkers but I still couldn't participate in those conversations because somehow for some reason that is just not something people talk about with me.
I guess it goes back to my looks. That sounds ridiculous, but I swear it's the truth. I look about five years younger than I actually am. On Wednesday someone at this new job asked me if I was about to start my freshman year at the college and when I told her I am actually a second-year graduate student she stared at me open-mouthed and then got all flustered and apologetic. The thing is, I don't mind mistakes like that. I especially don't mind them at work when I'm wearing very little make-up and have my hair pulled back. I'm well aware that the only time I actually look my age is when I'm dressed up to go out at night and even then I could still easily pass for 18 most of the time. Plus the older I get the more I realize I'd rather be mistaken for younger than my real age than older than my real age. So part of it is the way I look and part of it is just the attitude I project. That whole sweet and innocent image I somehow cultivated in high school just will. not. die. Once I get to know people they figure out that the sweetness is only a small facet of my personality and any innocence I had stopped existing about five years ago and really stopped existing sometime around winter of 2002-2003, but people meet me and regardless of what I do the first impression always seems to be some variation on sweet-and-innocent.
You all know this about me. I harp on it all the time. The thing is, it doesn't really bother me. It doesn't bother me because out of all of the first impressions I could be making, I'd rather be making the "nice, kind, sweet, good girl, friendly, cheerful" impression than the, "total bitch, whore, snobby, scary" impression.
But in situations like my old job it didn't really work in my favor. Because once people make the snap judgment that you're not a party girl it's very hard to convince them otherwise. And when the work culture revolves around post-work partying, that's going to make it hard to ever really fit in.

Especially if, like me, you're not REALLY a party girl. 'Cause that's the thing. I don't dislike partying. Some of the most fun nights of my life thus far have involved a keg, a pipe, losing track after the fourth shot, fooling around in the bathroom/coat room/elevator, and cops banging on the door at 2:30 in the morning. I consider a good night on 6th Street one that ends with eating a slice of street pizza while getting thrown out of the downtown Hilton. I've spent an entire week doing absolutely nothing but chugging from a beer bong by day and downing massive house drinks by night. 9 times out of 10 I'll say "Hell yes!" to getting another round of shots. I know that going to the river isn't really going to the river unless we have lots and lots of beer. So don't get me wrong, I really like a good party.
It's just not the only thing I like to do. I'd never consider myself a party girl. Even during spring and summer of my junior year, which was probably the heighth of my partying days so far (and will probably be the heighth of my partying days ever) I was still only hitting the Pub maybe 4 nights a week. I never drink by myself, not because I wouldn't, just because when I'm thinking of things to do "pour myself a drink" doesn't usually pop into my head. I definitely have never woken up in the morning, climbed out of bed, and immediately started drinking (except in Las Vegas and Padre which are complete anomalies and really don't even exist in the Real World). I am excited to get out of work/class every day, but not because that means it's now drinking time. Sure, hitting the bars sounds fun, but so does going to a movie, or going somewhere cool for dinner.

I enjoy a party or a night of bar hopping, but I enjoy dozens of other things equally. I don't spend my day wondering where my next drink is coming from.

So how does a girl like me answer the question, "So, do you party?"

Because I've already been asked that three different times at work. I'm telling you, I think it's a restaurant thing. Given, I only have one non-restaurant job to use as a basis for comparison. But at my non-restaurant job sure, we all went out drinking together after work sometimes and there were some people there that partied HARD, but I don't remember it being a constant topic of conversation. Maybe I always just pick the party people restaurants by accident and all restaurants aren't actually like this?

It's not a big deal. I like most of my coworkers so far and I've always viewed my jobs as the place where I work and not the place where I make friends anyway, but I would like to be able to mesh well with everyone and get along with my coworkers like I did at my previous performance hall job and not like the awkwardness that was my old restaurant job the first couple of years.

So how should I answer the question? "Yeah, I party...but I'm pretty sure it's nothing like the way YOU party."